I guess by now if you read my blogs or anything written by me you will see how much I love to preside over weddings! One of the lines I always like to include in the wedding ceremony vows is the statement, “Will you present her/him as a light to this world”? What I mean by this question is “Will you show your spouse always in a good light in front of others”?

It is so discouraging to me when I hear a spouse out with friends talking about the other in public in a bad way. There was a time when marriages were kept more sacred and the things that go on between a husband and wife stayed between a husband and wife. It appears that today this is not always the case. Our society has become liberal in our thinking that it is somehow “fashionable” to be out putting down our marriage partner. I don’t want to generalize too much here because I know there are couples who dearly cherish their marriage and would never think of doing this to the other. My marriage is one of them and I thank God every day of my life for giving me a husband who never talks bad about me or bad to me. Mutual respect is such an important gift in marriage and with any couple who are considering marriage. It is never to early to start good marriage habits and never too late to draw them into marriage. Our spouse is a gift to us. We have been given someone sacred in our life when we have a husband or wife. Keeping something sacred means to keep it private. There are some things between a husband and wife that should never be discussed with anyone unless the couple has mutually agreed to marriage counseling together. Every marriage has its issues. I remember a friend once shared with me that while growing up her father explained to her when he had an argument with her mother it was just God’s way of helping the married couple to become one. They struggle to resolve their differences and then come to a mutual learning experience or unified compromise. I like the idea of this but whether it is true or not it is still private and not even the closest people to us should ever interfere! In order to help this from happening it is advisable to keep couple issues between each other and not share all the details of marital struggles with others or in the spirit of venting allow ourselves to say things about our marriage partner that presents them in a bad light.

Marriage in a society where divorce is so prominant is hard enough without adding fuel to the challenges we might experience. When we present our spouse as a light to this world we are stating that we respect him/her enough to keep that person as a sacred gift to us that no one can ever step in and put down. It is a gift of mutual respect and honor. Allowing the other person in a marriage to shine is a precious gift that will give the marriage partners a strong feeling of value in the marriage. I think our society can use a strong dose of value, don’t you?

I so appreciate how my husband values me by presenting me as a light to his world and to others. Especially during times of illness and struggle it always feels like a life line has been given to me to hold onto when I have a marriage partner who values me so much that he keeps my personal and private things sacred. If I desire to speak of them then I have that option but I never hear him speaking of me in a bad light to others no matter what I might go through. We all travel through times of strength and sometimes we struggle, but it is always a strong bond that helps us through the struggle seasons!

Remember always to “present your spouse as a light to this world” and give them value, honor, and respect. Your marriage will flourish because of it and he/she will radiate in your marriage!

With love,

Pastor Jenine Marie Mason

The Fellowship Ministries

http://thefellowshipministrycenter.tripod.com